Attitude of Gratitude

Wedded Wednesday is a collaboration
of married bloggers sharing their inspirations,
anecdotes, struggles and thoughts regarding
the amazing union of two separate people, as one.
Check out the other Wedded Wednesday bloggers at Marital-Bless

Today being the day before Thanksgiving, it only seemed appropriate to do a post on thankfulness and appreciation, though I am thankful ALL year round. I am so very blessed to be married to my husband, he really is the best husband in the world!

Given that one of my husband’s top love languages is words of appreciation, I can definitely say that life in our marriage flows soooo much more smoothly when I remember to put my appreciation into words for him. Sometimes, I take for granted all the amazing and wonderful things he is and does and forget to tell him that, usually this slams me upside the head when things start getting a little funky in our communication. :) The wisdom that I’ve learned in the short time I’ve been married? Learn to verbally express appreciation/thankfulness/gratitude in your marriage (really, in all things). Men, in particular, tend to crave it as it directly links to their need for respect.

Expressing appreciation out loud is not something that comes naturally to me, I have a very sarcastic personality (as does the hubs) and the appreciation often seems to come out sounding forced or fake. Sometimes, it even sounds downright silly! It’s an area of my life where I have definitely worked very hard at. Really who doesn’t like to get a compliment and be appreciated? In the end, it’s worth all the fumbling around when I see him beam back at me after I tell him how grateful I am for him.

Does expressing appreciation and gratitude come naturally to any of you guys or is it something you’ve had to learn and work at?

Purely Elegant Giveaway!

As promised, here is the first of several giveaways coming your way! To celebrate the beautiful new blog design that I love, I decided to give away a piece of jewelry from my etsy shop, Purely Elegant! The winner can pick any item they want from the shop!






To enter, go check out the shop and leave me a comment with your favorite piece/pieces!

For Extra Entries:

Become a follower: leave 1 extra comment
Tweet the giveaway: leave 1 extra comment
Blog the giveaway: leave 2 extra comments

Make sure to leave a separate comment for each thing you do! I'll keep the contest open until Midnight EST Saturday, November 28th.

It's Here!

Well, what do you all think? (and for all you subscribers out there, you'll have to click over to see!) I'm still working to tweak things a little bit so you may see things move around a little bit over the next couple of days but I looooove my new blog layout! Many many thanks to Marina over at Penny Lane Designs for her help! I highly recommend her to anyone out there looking for any sort of blog assistance, she does everything!

To celebrate the new blog layout and my 100 post mark, I have a number of giveaways coming up in the next couple of weeks for you guys! I plan to post the first one this weekend so stay tuned! There will be a lot more posts coming up now that the blog is finished!

Marital Challenges & Blessings

Wedded Wednesday is a collaboration
of married bloggers sharing their inspirations,
anecdotes, struggles and thoughts regarding
the amazing union of two separate people, as one.
Check out the other Wedded Wednesday bloggers at Marital-Bless

Leah over at Marital Bless posted about the biggest challenges and blessings in her marriage and challenged other bloggers to do the same, here are my thoughts on my own marriage!

Challenges:
One of the biggest challenges is the differences between how we were brought up and our family styles. My family is large, conservative, close-knit, strong-willed, pretty loud, independent and very very involved with each others lives. My husband came from a much smaller, quiet, laid-back family, where everyone had their own life, own friends and kept to themselves. You can only imagine what it was like for my husband to move in with my family! He's managed to make it nearly a year and a half and to say it's been a challenge for both of us, would be an understatement. The stress of being caught in the middle between my family and my husband definitely has caused discussions on more than one occasion. The stress for my husband to adjust to the noise, no private space and people always in his business hasn't been easy for him to adjust to either. To say we look forward to the day when we have more private space is an understatement!

The other big challenge is communication and I think this is something that most, if not all couples, struggle with. In our case, I am used to confrontation and am not afraid to dig down and have it out if there is something to discuss (everyone always told me I should be a lawyer), I will logic and debate an issue to death. Meanwhile, my husband does not like or enjoy confrontation. He has more of the mindset that there is a "perfect answer" out there and he's just got to figure it out. He'd much rather avoid than confront.

Blessings
There are so many blessings in our marriage. My husband is my best friend, I can talk with him about anything. I have never experienced the emotional and spiritual intimacy with another person like I have experienced with him. He challenges me to be a better person and yet encourages me to be myself. We have the BEST times together, traveling, going on dates, lounging at home, cooking and so much more. He also encourages my relationship to deepen with God by setting an example for me, his love for me is deepened by his love for God and vice versa. I am not always the most eloquent person but another one of the amazing blessings is knowing that it's forever. I'm done, he's done, we're off the market. We have made our marriage covenant with each other, in front of God and are dedicated to each other. There is no back-up plan.

What about you guys? What are some of the challenges and blessings that you experience in your marriages and relationships?

Friday Edition of Love

YAY! It's Friday! I definitely did not feel like I was going to make it the whole week this week. My poor husband has been missing out on his love letters for who knows how many weeks now so today's post is dedicated to him.

Dear Romper,

You are the most amazing man I could ever have married, words cannot even begin to express all the amazing things about you but I'm going to try. You are such an incredible man of God, watching you pursue Him day after day, I am humbled by God's grace. You try so hard to do the right thing, be the right person, make people happy, get everything done, that sometimes I am just tired watching all that you do and succeed in. You are so gifted in your work! God is clearly with you, I'm grateful that I get to be a part of the big plans He has for you!

Watching you play hockey the past several weeks, I can only marvel at your mad skillz and abilities, I get the best of both worlds! Someone who could play professional but still has all his teeth! :) I cannot imagine possessing the talent you have and yet you humbly brush it off like it's not a big deal. I am SO proud of you out there on the ice, never did I imagine that ice hockey could be such an adrenaline rush yet so graceful at the same time, you make it look so easy. Our kids are going to be soooo lucky to have you as a Dad (and coach)!!! Your athletic abilities extend way beyond the ice rink and I am so grateful that not only do you take the time to keep yourself in shape but you also keep my butt in shape too....my butt would be a lot bigger if it weren't for you so, thank you!!!!!!!!!!!

To wrap it up, thank you for caring, caring about me, my job, my life and all my silliness, bet you didn't realize how much you were in for when you married me didya? Thank you for making my lunch every single day without fail, and bringing me breakfast in bed on the weekends. Thank you for taking the time to learn about my love language and not getting mad when I fail continually at loving you in your love language (I am determined to get better!)!!! Thank you for dragging my exhausted butt out of bed every morning, complete with grumpiness and running-lateness every day. Thank you for doing the laundry, and doing it right, for doing all the steaming, you're amazing! Thank you for letting me buy clothes and shoes boots without always questioning whether they are a need, I love my new "presents" and can't wait to wear them!

Thank you for being you, and for encouraging me to be me. I love you so much, infinity mostest (me!).

-Your Romper

Finding Your Place

Wedded Wednesday is a collaboration
of married bloggers sharing their inspirations,
anecdotes, struggles and thoughts regarding
the amazing union of two separate people, as one.
Check out the other Wedded Wednesday bloggers at Marital-Bless

I absolutely loved reading everyone's responses to last week's Wedded Wednesday post so I thought I would post a follow-up. If you couldn't tell from the previous post, I definitely lean more towards the traditional role of a wife in marriage, which isn't to say that I have anything against those who choose differently than me. I truly enjoy loving on my husband and taking care of him. I enjoy having a nice dinner cooked for him, or getting the house cleaned while he is out. I fully intend to stay at home with our kids as much as I can. I enjoy making our home a welcoming environment and I love baking delicious treats and entertaining. And yet, if I choose these things over throwing on a suit and working 10 hour days and busting my butt as I make my way up the corporate ladder, I am somehow demeaning woman and destroying everything that feminists worked so far to obtain.

*Ever the iconic figures, both from google images*

Why? In my opinion, the feminist movement was all about opportunities. Opening up channels that were never open to woman before. Now, it just seems like we're going to the other extreme and stuffing women right back in that box. How is it that we could come so far but yet we still insist on destroying each other's decisions? I know that women in general tend to be more judgemental and critical than men (in general, not across the board), but why is it that some people feel judged when you make a different decision than one they have made? Why do we feel so free to judge and criticize other people's lives and choices?

Lately I've noticed that a lot of women who I interact with have their self-esteem and self-worth all wrapped up in their lives and decisions/choices. Which means, while I am delighted to fulfil a more traditional role in my marriage, other women view it as a personal insult and an attack on their lifestyle! Why are woman so touchy? I don't want to hurt other woman or make them feel less fulfilled. I have no desire to cause anyone to feel as if they are doing everything wrong unless they choose to live their life like my own. It takes all kinds of people to make up the world! Yes, I could sit here and spout off statistics that support my views or the other parties views, but they're just blanket statistics, they don't address everyone's individual situation, and who am I to judge what is right and what is wrong? I understand that not everyone likes to cook or clean, I understand that not every woman has the maternal drive to stay at home with her kids or maybe it's the financial capability. But why can't it be ok for me, if that is my choice, if I do like those things and that is where my passion lies?

I specifically choose a career path that went beyond something that came naturally to me, something that I could support my family in, if need be, but could support them from home. There very well may come a day when I let my work know, I won't be returning, Do I know when that will be? No, but I know that I'll feel it in my heart when it's time. My heart is in my home, in taking care of those that God has given me to take care of. My desire is to love and honor God in my marriage and it's something that I will spend the rest of my life learning how to do. I guess my question to you guys this week is why? Why do we, as women, so often feel the need to tear other women down, in order to feel good about the decisions we have made? I'm very interested to hear what you all have to say!

We interrupt this blogging silence to bring you this public service annoucement!

I'm sure most (if not all) of you have heard of the membership-only sites like Gilt and Ruelala, but have you heard of One Kings Lane? Just in case you haven't, I thought I'd enlighten all of you! One Kings Lane is a discount members-only website that features amazing deals for your home. I've been a member practically since it opened and I love it! Now, before I explain it, I'd like to offer a disclaimer.

***This isn't the type of post where I try to convince you all to sign up so that I can get free stuff. Any time a member invites someone, they do get offered a credit for the first purchase the new member makes, but this is typical of all member-only sites. I really truly like One Kings Lane and I would be more than happy to send you an invite if any of you guys aren't members or don't have friends already signed up, but please don't feel like you need to do me any favors by signing up on an invite from me!***

Ok, now that that is out of the way, the reason I wanted to tell you guys about One Kings Lane is because they are having a Kate Spade and Henckels sale tomorrow! We registered for a number of Kate Spade items on our wedding registries so I am always on the lookout for additional pieces that coordinate with what we already have! They have new sales every day at 11AM eastern time, limited quantities available of each heavily discounted item and when they're gone, they're gone! They are also very generous with their credits and new e-giftcards. After I signed up, they gave me a $25 credit as a thank you, so I used the credit to get a gorgeous brand new henckel paring knife for $9! They feature contests every week where a random winner is selected and a couple of weeks ago, I won a $150 giftcard in one of their contests!

The site is still fairly new, so I find the competition isn't quite so fierce for the limited quantity items yet. But the promotion of the site has been all over the blogging world with many bloggers trying to convince people to sign up under their name, so I'm sure it will only be a matter of time until it is like gilt and ruelala.

Also, with the economy the way it is, the hubs and my Christmas budget is a bit smaller than normal so I've been stalking the site daily for presents for our friends and family. Cashmere blankets, art, spa and bath accessories....even furniture! I like the fact that I can make our budget stretch so much further at One Kings Lane. I even bought a few wedding gifts for friends that had registered for the same item at a department store for more than three times the cost on One Kings Lane (don't worry, I let them know that they could take it off their registry so that they wouldn't received duplicates).

How many of you are members of One Kings Lane? Any deals that you were particularly excited about?

The Wife Role

Wedded Wednesday is a collaboration
of married bloggers sharing their inspirations,
anecdotes, struggles and thoughts regarding
the amazing union of two separate people, as one.
Check out the other Wedded Wednesday bloggers at Marital-Bless

Lately I've noticed a lot of chatter in the blogsosphere world going on about marital roles and the meaning of the word wife. To be honest, I was quite taken aback at a lot of what I read, people were so negative towards the thought of being a wife or a mother. And this was written by wives! It was as if, fine, they succumbed to being married, but they are not husband and wife, they are merely partners. Does it seem to anyone else like the word "partner" just doesn't quite cut it? Many of the woman hated the thought or expression of "two becoming one", implying that it was demeaning towards women. Quite honestly, I just don't get it. To me, the expression of "two becoming one" represents two lives joining together, two separate paths meeting and becoming one, also in a religious sense, it represents a spiritual joining and intimacy.

On top of this, there was so much negativity towards the thought of nesting and criticism towards woman who talk about pillows, as if the thought that if you cared about pillows or your house decor, there must not be much going on up there. This coming from the same women who had just spent months blogging about their weddings and decor!

I've been mulling this post over for awhile trying to get it all sorted out in my head but it seems to me like there is a lot of fear and self-centeredness. These women talk about redefining the role of the wife, they are proud that they don't cook or clean, do their husband's laundry or anything else that they view as a "traditional" wife's role. I think one of the things that bothered me the most about this is, what is the point of getting married if it is straight down the middle, I take care of myself, you take care of yourself, we both go after our own goals and continue to live self-centered lives?

And what is wrong with a traditional wife role? Since when did it become a bad thing to cook or clean or care and love on your husband? I know for years people have been critical of stay-at-home moms and minivan driving moms, but it seems to me that's the judgement has spread to being a wife now. What's next? Is there anything left to judge? What is so wrong about the traditional wife and mother role? Anyone have any thoughts or opinions on this?

Who me?

Well apparently it's becoming my usual, dropping off the face of the earth every now and again. I've still been slowly recovering from the aftermath of the swine flu and at the same time, my father, who came down with the swine flu at the same time as myself, has progressed to pneumonia so I've been trying to devote ALL my spare time to him and his well-being and just trying to help the family out any way I can. Unfortunately this has not left much time for blogging! Prayers for his recovery would be greatly appreciated!

Work has recently made it quite challenging to blog on site so I'm going to have to get some posts scheduled until I can figure out a new work around. I have one more Love week post coming up and then it'll be time to tackle the results of the poll! It looks like boudoir, renovations and fitness were the most popular so we'll start there!

Lastly, I have some giveaways coming up very soon so stay tuned for those!

Fenway Park

We are big Red Sox fans in this house, long time followers and fans, we make it a point to attend several games in Boston every year, even now that we have moved several hundred miles away! For part of the husband's birthday this year, I worked with designer Gemini Studios to custom design a special Red Sox typography canvas for the hubby, I picked out all the phrases and words that I wanted printed on the canvas and he collaged them onto the canvas and figured out the overall layout. I love how it turned out!



He now has a version of the design posted for sale in his shop as well as many other really interesting typography designs. I'd like to purchase this one for the hubby as well to accompany the original piece I bought.



The husband LOVED his birthday present and currently has it proudly displayed! I love that it's an original piece of art that has a lot of meaning and happy memories for both of us! I don't know what I did before Etsy came into my world, clearly I was seriously deprived!